illness.
Many of you didn't know Shiloh because I didn't write a lot about her here, but she wasn't an ordinary cat (some pun intended) and I can say that honestly because I've never been a cat person.
An ordinary cat likely wouldn't have found a home with us and Shiloh found her way into our home and was part of the team at various times with all four of our dogs- Teddy, Chancellor, Big Ed and now Posey.
The story behind Shiloh coming with us dates back to either our first or second year after we bought our house.
She was just a small outdoor cat that showed up in the yard for a while that played with Cherie and Rachel outside for a bit and then she disappeared for a bit.
Cherie and I went around the neighborhood for a walk one day and this cat was lying on a front porch and it was like she looked at us, thought "Hey, I remember those people!" and followed us all the way home!
Shiloh ( I never liked the name that they gave her, reminded me of Neil Diamond- Bleech) was an indoor/outdoor cat (Ryan had to go out onto the outer porch a few times to break up her catfights at night) for a period before disappearing for a few days.
We figured that she must have wandered off to greener pastures or another home as happens with outdoor cats sometimes and Cherie and I were upstairs preparing for me to leave for work and we heard this light scratching at the upstairs door.
Upon checking it out, there was an injured Shiloh with her pelvis injured and one of her clavicles were dislocated.
A neighbor a few houses down was doing some remodeling and apparently, she had injured herself among the materials and drug herself that distance to our home where she must have on some level knew she had a safe haven.
I cannot imagine the pain that she must have felt or the courage that it took to make it here through that pain, but I brought her inside safely and took her to the vet the next day to repair her injuries.
Shiloh would fully recover and I told the family that now she was a permanent member of the family on the condition that she would now be an indoor-only cat for good.
Shiloh would have different relationships with each dog.
Teddy basically ignored this intruder, only acknowledging her when he would stumble into her path to be swatted at and then go about his business, while his buddy Chancellor gave Shiloh a very wide berth and stayed away from her.
Shiloh pretty much had the run of the house until Big Ed arrived and decided she would make a good rabbit and chased her through the house in a memorable run that I only wish would have been recorded!
After that race, Shiloh pretty much stayed upstairs by her choice and even Posey who was far closer to her size and wanted to play, Shiloh didn't want to interact very often.
I suppose that's why some of my friends from the graphing world didn't even know we had a cat because she so rarely came around downstairs around others.
She would come down on occasion, usually in the morning or later evening when things were calm and Posey was in another room.
I'll remember the last time that she came downstairs to hang out with me, as it was just Sunday and she acted just as always, trotting down the stairs and snuggling up to me on the couch as she licked my hand (I've always thought it was weird how rough cats tongues felt) and tried to bite the corner of my laptop as usual as well.
Shiloh didn't act any differently up until yesterday, although she had become visibly thinner over the last six months or so, as when I came back from the Muni to be told she was ill.
I went upstairs to "her" area and she saw me and meowed a lot and snuggled up to me on the floor.
Shiloh's eyes didn't seem to have that defeated look that my other pets had at the end, but it seemed pretty clear to me that something was clearly wrong.
Her eyes seemed bright and alert, but she had no interest in food or water and I was unsure of what to do.
I had the feeling that as underweight as she was, her return home wasn't going to be likely, but I did have hope.
However, I was told that the likely news wouldn't be good by the veterinarian and it was back to that awful decision that every pet owner contends with.
This one was easier and harder in different ways than with Teddy and Ed.
It was easier because after hearing what was likely to be done, Shiloh would have basically lived her entire life with only one bad day and wouldn't we all be that fortunate?
One of my college instructors once said that her life motto was "Live Long and Die Fast", which basically meant live a long life and end quickly without pain and suffering and that always stuck with me.
That helped me with Shiloh, but it was harder in another way as Teddy and Ed each had that look of resignation that they "knew".
Shiloh may have had that in body, but those eyes made me think again and made the decision harder.
When Ed passed, he had a medicine that gave us hope and for a week, he was back to himself.
However, the crash was heartbreaking for him and for us to watch and the one thing that Cherie asked before I left with Shiloh was to make sure that what happened to Ed, didn't happen here with false hope.
I'll miss the little gal and that's coming from a person that never considered himself too much of a cat person.
She had a sweet personality that saw her not mind being touched but on her terms.
She wasn't the type of pet that enjoyed being picked up and carried around, yet she would come to you and nuzzle you when she wanted to.
She'll be missed.
And now for the three of us here, the final link to the days that Ryan lived here is gone and for the first time in roughly 17 years, there is only one pet in the house.
It won't make a difference in noise, Shiloh was a very quiet pet, but it feels a little different this morning.
It's hard to put into words, but it's a different house than the one I woke up to yesterday and we'll adjust, but it's never a breeze in these situations.
But if we just allow time to pass, it'll be ok.
I started to write a road trip post on last weekend's trip to the Hudson Valley Renegades, but this took precedence.
I'll try to work on it later tonight.
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